Monday, September 21, 2009

I'll take you for who you are, if you'll take me for everything

I think I have finally picked a major for college. I want to be a criminal psychologist. Not because television makes it look glamorous, but because I think that I could actually really enjoy that job. Maybe, not so much enjoy it, as be able to actually be interested in it. I already know what you're thinking, you're thinking; "But Erin, you have such a talent for writing! Why don't you go into journalism???" I plan on publishing my books, but I need a side job, and think, when it says on the back cover:

"Erin Howie lives in North Carolina with her hippy husband and seven kids named Moon Beam, Sunshine, Aurora, Flower, Fern, Peace and Love. She works as a CRIMINAL PSYCHOLOGIST when she isn't eating peanut butter sandwhiches, writing amazing stories or sitting on her fat ass watching television."

Wouldn't you totally shit all over yourself and be like "OH MY FUCKING GOD?!?!?!??!! SHE'S a criminal PSYCHOLOGIST??!?!?! HOW COOL!??!?!?!???!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!"

No?
Well you're a loser and no one likes you. Not even your mom. In fact she told me last night in bed.

Erin's conversation of the day:
Erin: Yeah, seven boys and five girls. That's twelve right.
Kate: yes
Erin: Yes, Erin, seven plus five equals twelve, you dumb ass.

1 comment:

personality: unique said...

LOL!!! That was hilarious!!
And I would totally buy all your books just to read what you put under author info!