No surprise

That I am fucking stressed out all over again. I hate my life. Every aspect of my life. I hate marching band. I hate student council. I hate my mother. I hate my father. I hate not having enough money, ever. I hate the fact that everyone always talks down at me. I hate it all. I am so stressed out. My hair's falling out again. My dumb ass mother refuses to go get my prescription. at this rate the only thing I have to look forward to is a premature death. Ugh. I hate it all.

Now and forever more, you'll be in my heart.
If I tell you I love you,
Can I keep you forever?
Kiss me. Kiss me as if it were the last time.

If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you

Let me be your wings
One look at your smile and I could see the light shining everywhere
Very, Very extraordinary
Every day I'll take you higher and I'll never let you fall

You...might come to see you were meant to be so much more.
One heart, tenderly beating, ever entreating, constant and true
Unless its you, I don't want to spend forever with anyone else.

Six more posts

And I will be at two hundred. I wonder why I found it hard to believe that my boyfriend hadn't read them all yet.
Lets talk about procrastination today, children. Procrastination is probably the number one reason why parents beat their children and why people kill each other. You put off paying the landlord until its too late. You put off paying your supplier of weed until the last minute, trust me I've been there, those hoes always forget to bring me my money. I'm just kidding, I'm just kidding but seriously, have you ever thought about it that way? If nobody procrastinated we'd probably have a lower crime rate. Don't you think?
That's all I really had to say for today.

Erin's shining moment of the day:
I repeatedly pushed on a pull door for about fifteen minutes straight.

Oh yeah. I'm a genius.

I'll take you for who you are, if you'll take me for everything

I think I have finally picked a major for college. I want to be a criminal psychologist. Not because television makes it look glamorous, but because I think that I could actually really enjoy that job. Maybe, not so much enjoy it, as be able to actually be interested in it. I already know what you're thinking, you're thinking; "But Erin, you have such a talent for writing! Why don't you go into journalism???" I plan on publishing my books, but I need a side job, and think, when it says on the back cover:

"Erin Howie lives in North Carolina with her hippy husband and seven kids named Moon Beam, Sunshine, Aurora, Flower, Fern, Peace and Love. She works as a CRIMINAL PSYCHOLOGIST when she isn't eating peanut butter sandwhiches, writing amazing stories or sitting on her fat ass watching television."

Wouldn't you totally shit all over yourself and be like "OH MY FUCKING GOD?!?!?!??!! SHE'S a criminal PSYCHOLOGIST??!?!?! HOW COOL!??!?!?!???!?!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!!?!?!?!??!?!?!?!"

No?
Well you're a loser and no one likes you. Not even your mom. In fact she told me last night in bed.

Erin's conversation of the day:
Erin: Yeah, seven boys and five girls. That's twelve right.
Kate: yes
Erin: Yes, Erin, seven plus five equals twelve, you dumb ass.

Holding your scarred heart in hand

So, today basically sucked ass. Big hairy black ass.

Dentist stabbed me in the gum, I bled all over the place. Fml

The only time I could sign up for this robotic baby was on my BIRTHDAY. Fml

The part I got in the class play was "Other Fairgoer" and I have to SHARE that part with my two other friends who Masser doesn't seem to like. Fml.

Apparently, I'm not allowed to complain in front of Anna because everything I say, something in her life sucks worse. And she acts like I'm not allowed to complain because everything's just fucking great because Ben got Wilbur, now DON'T GET ME WRONG, I'm happy for Ben, I'm not mad that he got a better part than me. I'm really happy for him, I knew he was going to get it. He was really good. I'm upset because I got pretty much the worst part there was in the entire play. I might have ONE LINE, if that. Whenever Anna is upset about something, I'm there for her, but today I wasn't allowed to be upset because when I said that I had to take care of the damn baby on my fucking birthday she was like "I have a cavalcade on my birthday" and when I said that I'm not having a birthday party she was like "Its my sweet sixteen and I'm not having a birthday party" well you're probably atleast going to see your boyfriend on your birthday, I don't even get that. But at this point I was just like whatever, Anna, your life sucks worse than mine, I'm sorry I complained, I'm so fucking happy right now I can't contain myself because apparently you don't know how to be here for me when I'm down. So next time, you're upset and someone ignores you, think of the way you treated me. Because I won't show you any sympathy next time you're crying. Fml.

And I'm happy pretty much all the time, so I think its healthy for me to be upset every once in awhile. But everyone crawls up my goddamn ass whenever I get upset, what's the point of having friends when no one gives two shits and has bigger problems than you when you're upset? There. Is. No. Point.

Now not all my friends were like that. In fact, it was just Anna. But I don't give a fuck anymore. I'll be there for her when she needs but I realize now that she's not the person I need to turn to when I need someone to be there for me. That's why you have more than just one friend.

Psychology Projects, School Plays and how your mom got involved

My psych project is going to be incredible. I can not wait to get started. It has to do with something I'm good at. Giving hugs. But to strangers. Yes. I'll let you ponder that one.

School Play, can't wait to see if I got a part. I really wanted to be the lamb. Honestly, that's the only part I really wanted a super lot.

My birthday is in FIFTEEN DAYS. I'm really excited about my birthday. Nick has me all excited. He told me he got me something but he won't tell me what. There are two seperate parts. One starts with a P and the other starts with an H and apparently its super obvious, only I can't seem to figure it out. Oh well, if you figure it out, you should tell me.

Epic quotes

So I realized that I haven't updated this in forever and this used to be my life source. So, what have I accomplished this summer?
I've changed alot this summer, I'm pretty much a new person. I'm happier, prettier, skinnier and much more. I changed boyfriends and I really think that's what's made me so much happier. Nick is AMAZING. He's the sweetest boy I've ever met, hands down.

So, I know what you're waiting for. Where are the new editions to Erin's epic quotes? Now, this first one is pretty epic so I advise you to sit back in your chair, put down the alcoholic drink you are drinking to make reading this blog less painful, and put on your seatbelt because this bitch is going to blow you away.

This is the world's most epic swear.























"Holy cocksuckingdickshittingpissfuck!"













Yes, I was hyped up on some kind of good weed when I said that one. Just kidding, I don't smoke, period.

Now, for more epic quotes. Most of them involve swear words.

Some random person, who, I forget at the moment: Can we take a picture together?
Me: Sure we can take a picture together, come back to my place and slip into something more comfortable and we can take a picture, alright.

Nick and I both: *making the squeaking sounds he taught me*
Me: Is this our mating call?
Nick: *laughs and hugs me* You're amazing

Me: I did the rain dance, I made it rain, because I'm Jesus.
Amanda: You have a penis?
Me: Yes, its detachable. You fasten on with Velcro

Me: Do you think I'm sexy?
Nick: You have your way of driving me crazy.
Me: So do you think I'm sexy?
Nick: That was a yes, dear.

Me: I really wanted to tell her to suck my throbbing dick but that wouldn't have worked out too well.
Becca: Because you don't have one?
Me: No, because she might think it was an actual invite.

Me: I swear on my left testicle
Kori: You don't have one of those
Me: I only have the left one, something very tragic happened to my right one.

Me: for sex, you know something normal people do

(Just FYI, Erin is still a virgin. haha)

Now, I have to go eat, its kind of required for me to....you know, live.